"Tell me how I'm s'posed to breathe with no air"

Something pretty drastic happened to me during church this morning. It was weird. Its been a looong time since I've been unconscious, so suddenly getting to experience that again was a surprise.


I think it was due to a major lack of sleep in the past week and a half, and the addition of minimal nourishment before heading off to church. I'd be willing to bet that my having worked three shifts in a row, all on the weekend, also played a part. No matter what the cause, though, it happened.


We were singing the Sanctus, I think, and the first clue I had that something we messed up was when I realized that I was having issues singing half a stanza on one breath, when normally I can sing two full stanzas in one long shot. Suddenly struggling with singing a quarter of that was pretty scary. And then, everything got really warm, and the people and things in front of me got all splotchy and fuzzy. Then I knew that I was about to faint.


I sat down and leaned forward to get the oxygen to my head, and Kate sat down beside me too, and sort of put her arm around me comfortingly. People were singing all around me, but the sound was muffled and sounded far away. All except for Kate. I could still hear Kate singing beside me. But that's the last that I remember.


Can't breathe... can't see... can't hear...


I am asleep. In bed? I must be. Its so warm. I should have taken off one of my blankets before I went to bed last night. I seem to be rocking. Spinning. But its not uncomfortable. I haven't slept this well in weeks! Time passes and it feels like hours. Days. A week.


WHAM!


I'm slumped forward, my father and mother sitting beside me saying words I don't understand, Grace Anne looking worriedly at me. A rush of air. Something cold pressing into my hand. "Drink it, Faith, it will help." I drink no knowing what it is. Water. Cold and smooth. When was the last time I drank water? Music all around. Everyone is still standing. Have I moved at all? What day is it?


Apparently I was out for a full minute before they could bring me back, and my dad had to make me lean forward because I was resisting him. Kate's hymnal fell from my lap when I went out, and that must have been what got my parents' attention. I slumped over onto Kate's lap, and although I was out of it, my mom says my eyes were wide open and dilated. Also, before I slumped out all limp into Kate's lap, I apparently tensed up and did sort crumpled into a tight sort of position, and was making raspy breathing sounds. (That's not creepy or anything.)
And I honestly don't remember any of it. I seriously thought I had dreamed going to church and I was asleep again. My first thought when I woke back up was that it had been a full week and we were back at church. It seriously felt like a full week had passed in the space of time that I was out and I was all confused about why everyone was fussing over me.

Supposedly not too many people noticed (unfortunately. It would have been so cool if it had been this huge commotion, although I suppose its best this way since it happened in church), but still I was so out of it that mom decided to take me home.


Like I said, its been a long time since I've been unconscious like this. I've never fainted before, but I have had the wind knocked out of me. That time it was actually painful. And it felt like hours, and there were red and yellow and black things spiraling. And yeah that time there really was no air.

Today wasn't painful. I didn't feel like a beached fish gasping for its last breath. It felt like falling asleep. ("It felt like going home.") It was comfortable, and I wished that they hadn't woken me up at all. As long as you don't hit anything on the way down, fainting isn't painful. It feels very nice, actually. It definitely doesn't hurt.